Lovelace in the City: Ghetto Love

Hey World!

This week, I want to talk about something serious, GHETTO LOVE! I personally have never been part of this phenomenon, but know several people who only know this kind of love.

What actually is ghetto love? It’s that kind ride or die kind of love; go to jail for your boo love, stand by your man during his jail time kind of love. I do not offer that kind of love!

I have this friend, we will call her Ms. Doe. Ms. Doe believes strongly in ghetto love. Every man she's ever dated fits the description of no good. They never have a “legal” job, lay up in her house while she works, consistently cheats and the occasional physical abuse. She loooooovvveeesss them regardless, and puts any man before her kids. According to her, they have the best sex and that is enough for her. To me, is just desperate and bad parenting. I always say, No dick is platinum! Over the last few years, she's been in the ultimate ghetto love relationship. Her boo of choice has never had a real job, cheated on her about two weeks AFTER he proposed, physically abused her and the list goes on. To pledge her love, she even got his first and last name tattooed on her body! (I've never believed in getting another man’s name permanently inked on my body EVER; just my personal preference.)

Her devotion to this man has gotten her locked up and taken away from her children! Apparently, he was arrested with her, but that does not excuse the fact her custodial rights are severely threatened. All of her friends, including me told her numerous times she deserves more and to put her kids first. I also told her I cannot be around her while she is with that specific man. I am not certain as to why she was arrested, but I have no doubt in my mind that it was because of ghetto love.

My question....is ghetto love worth a woman’s future with her kids, career and life? There are many women who subject themselves to such relationships, but for the life of me, I can't understand why. We as women need to know our worth and protect our children. As much as I want to be in a relationship, I am NOT willing to settle for being used and abused by NO MAN! I hope after Ms. Doe’s legal woes are over, she will gain a new perspective on life!

Tune in next week to see what kind of loveless foolishness I can get myself into!

Remember ladies, love yourself first and laugh at the fools who don’t!

XOXO Angel

Tubular Thrifting

I'm just starting to enjoy thrifting. I used to dread going into a thrift store and picking through all the clutter. But just recently, I've grown to enjoy something I thought was a chore. In fact, I'm taking a friend thrifting next week. Hopefully I find some good stuff. I'll keep you posted!

Dress: Goodwill (retail $2.99) Belt: (My favorite belt) Lane Bryant Boots: Old Navy Necklace: Princess (retail $1.99)

This little 80's moo moo is so cute with a belt to give me some sort of waistline and definition. I saw the print and I had to have it! I love the 80's!

Oh and speaking of thrifting, I just bought some Steve Maddens from an online thrift store called, The Fly's Nest, on the Sense of Fashion website. I haven't gotten them yet...but they we're a size 11. You have to snatch up the size 11s! They go fast.

~ Janelle

Working Toward Family Fun: Part Four We Want Friday!

Don’t you love the weekend? Families need to pick an activity for Friday to help the family look forward to something to do. We need to take back our Friday! This can be a way to create a tradition for your family. You can do something from free and affordable.

QUICK TIPS FOR FAMILY FUN FRIDAY

Have a Movie night at home. Create the kitchen to resemble a concession stand with all the goodies.

Make dinner together; homemade pizzas, nachos or your favorites.

Play board games.

Bowling

Skating

Check out some local talent

Visit family

Have family pitch-in dinner. It's an easy way to get rid of leftovers.

What would you and your family do for family fun Friday?

~Takia

Pull the Thread: Avid Accents Review

I ordered a cardigan from Avid Accents about a month ago. Avid Accents is an online boutique selling both plus and standard size apparel and accessories. The price points range from $10 to $25.

 I haven't worn the sweater yet, so this weekend I decided to give it a try.

Let me just say, when I got the package I was at work. Everytime I receive clothes at work, it brightens the rest of my day. Opening the package, I found a little hand addressed card with a coupon code AND a free pair of earrings. It was a plus the purple leaf earrings matched the cardigan perfectly. Too bad the holes in my ears are now closed and I've been forced to wear clip ons. (I've had my ears pierced four times since birth; I refuse to get them done again.) So the earrings {sniff} will be regifted.

Notice the coupon code.

I LOVE THIS SWEATER! It is truly one of my favorite things in my closet. The construction of the garment is beautifully done (which scared me because the sweater was only $15). The material is breathable and the colors are vibrant. The only thing wrong was the belt that was included; It didn't fit at all. But I had a black belt in closet anyways, so I wore that instead.



Cardigan: Avid Accents (retail $15)
Black Tank: Old Navy
Belt: Lane Bryant
Jeans: Source of Wisdom from Torrid 

I got many compliments about this cardigan and shared my experiences with Avid Accents with everyone that asked. I will be ordering from them again! Stop by their website RIGHT NOW for 30% off the retail price on ALL their items.

~Janelle

Lovelace in the City: Where's Mr. Nice Guy?

Hello Friends!

I hope everyone had a fantastic week! Fortunately, nothing crazy happened in my life over this past week;  it actually makes me a little nervous. You know what they say, it's the quiet before the storm! Since everything has been so low key, it has given me time to think about the men, past and present, I've dated.

The result of all my thinking, I've concluded I'm attracted to jerks and that needs to stop! I realized all of my serious relationships have been with men that are arrogant, selfish and insensitive. Now don't get me wrong, they never start out that way. They are very charismatic, charming and romantic. They always seem to know how to keep me intrigued with their conversation, sense of humor and wit. As I reflect back, as the past relationships seems to be moving forward to more serious or long-term roads, they show their true jerk self!

The everyday phone calls turn into every few days. The I miss you texts slowly start to fade. Conversation is at a standstill and the quality time has come to an abrupt end; and at times even cheating occurs. These men manage to say things that hurt my feelings and have no remorse, would rather hang with their friends than me or pick fights to make me feel guilty. Once it reaches this stage, I find myself questioning the relationship or trying to figure what went wrong. Was it something I did or said? Me being me, I want to talk things through and get to the bottom of things. I also find myself more attracted to them and wanting to be around them more. WTF is wrong with me? I assume I am gluten for punishment and cannot for the life of me figure out why finding a nice guy to date is so difficult.

That brings up another question, Do nice guys really finish last? Why is it so hard to date the nice guy? The few guys I've dated were nice. I always felt as if I would run-over them and be tempted to take advantage of their kindness, so I stay away. Now that I'm getting serious about the qualities I want in a man, I realize I do want a nice guy!  For the rest of the year, I am vowing to stay away from jerks as much as possible or dismiss them as soon as the first sign of jerkish tendencies rears its ugly head. I'm a loving kind person and deserve to be with someone similar! So farewell to the jerks and hello to Mr. Nice Guy!!!

Tune in next week to see what kind of loveless foolishness I can get myself into!

Remember ladies, love yourself first and laugh at the fools who don’t!

XOXO Angel

Really? Neti Pots

My boyfriend has horrible sinus problems. He was told by his doctors not even surgery could help. It's so bad it affects his sense of smell and taste. I've been trying to get him to try alternative methods to help him with his situation. I suggested a neti pot for YEARS...literally since we've been together. So while we were at the store this weekend, he snuck a cylinder similar to a neti pot in the cart. Men are so typical!

Neti pots are supposed to help remove all the toxins, impurities and nasty gunk from your nostrils and sinus cavity. Getting rid of the impurities in your body helps to ward off illness and give you energy. People practicing Holistic medicine and some doctors swear by neti pots.You put the spout in one nostril, bend your head down, make sure your mouth is OPEN and you're BREATHING (notice this is in caps...because someone almost drowned themselves) and squeeze or pour depending on the type of pot you have. The saline solution should come out of your other nostril; washing away any impurities you may have hiding in your cavities. 

Okay...this process was HILARIOUS and we laughed until we cried. You're supposed to do it twice a day; but he's only done it twice since Monday. He really notices a difference in his breathing. Ummm do we have something here? Really?

WARNING: The pictures you're about to see are not for the easily squeamish!

Hahahahaha...he's going to kill me for posting these!

Janelle

Working Toward Family Fun: Part Three

Writing "Date with my Mate", I decided to continue the family fun series and talk about planning a family vacation.

Family vacations are the most unpredictable events or your life; you don’t know how many stories are going to be involved in the end. Thanksgiving 2009, we decided to take a road trip to Washington D.C.. It took us 12 hours to get to our final destination. We invested in a charger for all electronics we took; from laptops to cell phones. The laptop comes in handy so the kids can watch movies and fall asleep. Packing a c

when we filled up the truck bathroom and snack breaks. 

 Last July, my family and I decide to go to an amusement park for the day. We took a two and a half hour drive with a four and seven year old. It was our first amusement park trip and I learned so much. The family lockers are not big enough! Can you imagine a family of four putting their clothes and shoes in a locker you can barely fit two dictionaries in? Overpriced food is a big NO-NO! Pack a cooler with your favorite’s snacks, sandwiches, juices and water. 

Quick Tips on Family Vacation

Plan ahead what you want to do on the trip.(Sightseeing, visit family, or relaxing)

How long and when are you staying? Check out specials; compare week vs. weekend pricing.

Ask family or friends about their favorite places.

Check for places with kitchenette to save money.

Pack cooler with favorite goodies. Go to deli for fresh lunch meat and cheese.

Pack plastics; no glass for safety.

If you're going someplace with washer and dryer; pack less.

Take movies and activity books for the kids to keep them busy.

Where to Stay

Family

Rent a condo/home (Split the bill with another family)

Hotel

Cabin (Sleeps from 2-12 people)

Check out websites

http://www.aaa.com

 

http://www.homeaway.com

http://www.volunteercabinrentals.com

 

 

 

Takia

Lovelace in the City: Sunday Morning

Hello Friends!

Well foolishness has resurrected its ugly head over this last week! I almost feel as if this could be my fault since I let my guard down just a tinch. My closest friends always say I have mannish behavior and take on the male role in some relationships. Let me explain my definition of mannish behavior. These behaviors can include: not calling the potential boo for several days in a row, sitting on the couch doing nothing and simply not answering your phone, after sex telling them to leave or get yourself quickly dressed and exit the premises, not expressing ANY emotion and preferring to hang with friends instead of your boo. Sometimes I make a conscious effort to repress these behaviors and act more like a woman; by showing concern when not called, being nice, making conversation and wanting to spend quality time. When showing my woman side, I ALWAYS gets my feelings hurt. With that said, let me tell you about this week’s latest casualty!

I met this guy (we’ll call him Sunday Morning) through an online dating site a few months ago. We talked very briefly, about two weeks, before we stopped calling each other. He had potential to become a boo; good job, car, only one child, etc. My only issue with him at the time was he spoke of futuristic things too soon for my liking. He would make comments about us moving in together and moving out of town. Clearly that freaked me out since that was in our first conversation.

Anywhoo, he emailed me last week talking about he missed me and complications with his phone prevented him from calling since he had lost all contacts (and I delete people really really fast). I decided to entertain the idea since I know how stupid smart phones can be. The first day of contact resulted in tons of text messages of him saying he missed me and really wanted to see me. Of course all women want to hear those things, so yea, I was flattered and felt a little giddy. So against my better mannish behavior, I responded to his texts, planned an evening to hang out and even talked to him while Private Practice was on!!!! WTF? I only talk to my friends via text during that show! So I let him come over the next evening. The evening was going well. We had very good conversation about relationships, goals, kids and marriage! (Yea I know, it freaked me out at first, but liked the idea of thinking ahead with someone). Then it happened, he kissed me. LAWD, those lips of his are STUPEFYING!!!!! That’s the best word to describe it because I became stupid for the next several hours! After the evening wrapped up, I felt like a little school girl with butterflies, hoping more would come.

Unfortunately, it’s a wrap! I called the next day, as requested, NO ANSWER. I waited a few days later to call again or at least see if he would call me back. Nope, nada, nothing, no call, no text, no talk!!!!! WOW! It’s been a week since I have last spoken with him and have already deleted him from my phone again! The saddest part is he will be like all the others and call/text within the next few weeks; crying that same tune “I miss you”. My response will be to him: Well you will just have to miss me some more because you won’t be talking to me!

Talk about feeling rejected and crushed. Damn, I knew I should have kept my guard up. Whelp, I guess it’s back to my mannish behavior a while longer.

Tune in next week to see what kind of loveless foolishness I can get myself into!

Remember ladies, love yourself first and laugh at the fools who don’t!

XOXO Angel

Working Toward Family Fun: Part Two

Date with My Mate

Taking time out for you and your mate is VERY important. Dating your mate can be very affordable and even sometimes FREE. Our children are watching us; we're raising someone's future wife or husband. We need to set a good example. You can break and take time with your mate anytime; you don't have to go out. Have a breakfast or lunch date when the kids are in school. This is a great way to save money...you don't have to pay a sitter.
Here are a few themes or ideas for dating your mate:

Set a monthly date.
Make meals together for your date.
Order lunch and a movie (Netflix or any movie membership is a plus)
Check out some local food places.
Catch up on some of those DVR programs.
Call off work.
Go to the park.
Take pictures outdoors.

If a day is not enough with your boo, try a weekend getaway. Invest in AAA or a travel agent, find a sitter who can also house sit and go on an adult's only road trip. Reading directions, stopping at outlet malls or stopping for a quick bite to eat are all activities we take for granted. Make a CD or IPod playlist for the trip. If you don't feel like traveling far, check out a local bed in breakfast. You can pack a cooler or pick a hotel or room with a kitchenette to save money. You can also log your trip on video to keep your memories and share with family and friends. No sex tapes please!

~Takia

Local Love: Indiana Fashionista Blogger Luncheon

Happy Monday! This was my last weekend of freedom before spring classes began. What's the best way to spend my last weekend of full pleasure? Meeting new people...of course. So Julia (from Aesthetic Design Style) and I made the trip down to Bloomington to have lunch with some of the movers and shakers in the Indiana fashion industry.

The luncheon, planned by Leah Barr of Circle City Style, included attendees from Indianapolis and Bloomington; bloggers and photographers. In attendance was myself and Julia Rutland from Aesthetic Design Style, Michael Trace from Michael Trace Photography, Crystal Hammon and Emily Lytle-Painter from Dresses Her Days Vintage, Jessica Quirk from What I Wore, freelance fashion writer Erica Sagon, Truen James creative director of  the House of 5th clothing label and treasurer of Indianapolis Fashion Collective, Christy Pastore founder of the online magazine Fashion Wrap Up, Chelsea Kouns model and the 2011 face of Fashion Wrap Up, Kaitlyn Elyse Fashion Wrap Up stylist, owner and creator of T. Party Clothing and photographer David Van Deman.

We noshed on Indian and Thai food at Cafe Django, laughed and talked shop. It was great to finally meet the  people I talk to everyday on Twitter and Facebook in person. To all you other Indiana bloggers out there, there will be many more meetings of the minds in the near future.

Kaitlyn of Fashion Wrap Up/T.Party Clothing and Truen of House of 5th/Indianapolis Fashion Collective

Leah of Circle City Style, Christy and Chelsea of Fashion Wrap Up

Crystal and Emily of Dressed Her Days Vintage

Julia of Aesthetic Design Style, Jessica of What I Wore and Erica

Both ladies of Fashion Wrap Up

Julia and Jessica

After my time in Bloomington, I ran to my sister's house so I can see the Colts slaughter the Jets...or so I thought! Yeah we loss, the final score 17 to 16. It was very upsetting. My sister's friend, Sarah, was more enjoyable than the game. I have a huge potty mouth, but you have to know when to shut if off. If no one else is talking rude and crass, I think you should keep your mouth to a minimum. Needless to say my church going religious mother shuttered every time Sarah let a cuss word or a crude comment slip from her mouth. It was funny to watch and I almost thought my mom was going to wash Sarah's mouth out with soap! LOL

My sister Maya and her friend Sarah

The smokies Sarah kept commenting on..."They're so f@*kin fire!"

Classes start today and I'm not a bit excited. This was probably my last weekend for free time until summer, but I was happy to spend it with talented and entertaining people!

Janelle

Who is Georges Chakra?

The blogs are still raving about Queen Latifah's turquoise and white ombre Georges Chakra piece. 

(pic from Red Carpet Fashion Awards)

After seeing this piece and the other pink Chakra piece the Queen wore that night, I wanted to know more about Georges Chakra.

Chakra is a Lebanonese designer that's been on the scene since 2002. His ready to wear line, Edition by Georges Chakra, was born in 2009. Using Yves Saint Laurent as his influence, Chakra has designed for many other celebrities like Queen Latifah, Beyonce, Carrie Underwood and others. 

Here is the Edition by Georges Chakra 2011 Spring Summer runway show from New York fashion week. 

Look for another turquoise and white ensemble in the runway show...GASP!

Janelle

Dating with Angel Lovelace

Hello world! My name is Angel Lovelace. I am a 27-year-old college student, looking for love; apparently in all the wrong places. Although I've never written a blog before, I jumped at the opportunity to share my dating experiences with you. I am in NO WAY an expert, but my dating life could closely resemble a TV sitcom! Trust me my stories are just that crazy. I couldn't make them up even if I tried. 

 

It’s 2011, out with the old and in with the new! I say that every year and every year, like clockwork, one of my old boos calls or texts me. All I can think is, damn here we go again! So just the other day Mr. Rogers (names have been changed to protect their egos) calls. 

Let me give you some background info on Mr. Rogers. He and I met through our best friends and dated long-distance for a little over a year. I will admit I was very much in denial at the beginning of the relationship about my feelings for him. YES I liked him, but wasn’t sure if I “liked-liked” him! We made a point to see each other at least once a month and we're very happy in the relationship (so I thought). I like to think our relationship was very easy-going. We never argued and got along with each other’s families and friends. Then it happened, my family brought up MARRIAGE (which will be addressed on another day). He seemed to go with the topic and said WE would be ready in about another year and a half! (Janelle heard it too!!) Long story short, he slowly but surely stop calling!! He started calling and texting randomly, at that point I was pissed and didn't want to be bothered.

Fast forward to a few days ago. Mr. Rogers called and I'm instantly reminded why I am glad that we are no longer in a relationship. We were having a very random conversation about marriage. This fool says I’m obsessed with marriage. I politely corrected him and told him I was obsessed with weddings; clearly different. He goes to say that weddings and marriage are the same thing!!! WTF? I make my argument of the differences and yes, I want to be married, but not because of the wedding; because I want to spend the rest of my life with someone special!  He also says he was great sexually! OMG, I almost choked on my spit! I disagreed politely by making my infamous hhmmmm sound. *Light Bulb flashes* Now I know why he stopped calling: 1. He’s not ready to think about marriage or make a commitment and 2. He was OVER CONFIDENT in his bedroom skills!!!!! As I look back, I’m glad he pulled away, instead of me eventually hurting his feelings! I am at the point in my life where I am looking for a lover, friend, companion and partner all wrapped into one. Someone who wants to be married and have children. If they are not on the same page, then I am chucking the deuces! So with that said regarding Mr. Rogers, “another one bites the dust”!

 Tune in next week to see what kind of foolishness has happened in my dating life! 

Remember to love yourself first and laugh at the fools who don’t!

XOXO Angel 

                                                                                                

If there is any topic you want to see me address or if you have any questions, feel free to contact me at rubyleonne@gmail.com.

All Hail to the Queen

Queen Latifah hosted last night's People's Choice Awards. Ms. Dana Owens has come a long way from the dashiki wearing rapper spitting rhymes about women's rights and unity. She's always been goregous in my book and last night was no exception! 

Old Skool Latifah....

 

 

~Janelle

Working Toward Family Fun: Part One

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! Make this year a BRAND new start for your family to spend more time together. I’m honored to write about family issues. Family can be wonderful when they all get along, but sometimes every family has their moments. Family values have changed from generations to generations. There are a lot of things that I want to share and challenge you and your family to do. 

(pic from Yoga in my Schools)

The first project I want to recommend is completing a GOAL POSTER for the family; then do one for each individual. Goal posters are great projects for family to do. Get some markers, paints, crayons, glitters, glue, poster, scissors, and magazines. Goals can be anything from clean house, dream house, new car, saving money, adding a new addition to the family (spouse, baby or pet) and vacations. Cut out pictures from old magazines or catalogs, and paste the pictures on the poster. When your finished put the poster up in a common area in the house. Every time you accomplish something, be sure to put the date on the poster. So your family can reflect on their accomplishments throughout the year. 

Remember, goal posters can be short or long term, so you can do one for each season. Have FUN!!!

~Takia

Purge to Splurge: My Yearly Closet Enema

When the housing market crashed and property taxes skyrocketed, we lost our house. Since then my fiance and I went from a roomy three bedroom house to a cramp two bedroom apartment. We loss so much closet space. Most of our closets are still filled with boxes of unpacked stuff. Jay and I must share a closet in the bedroom. I'm glad my mother taught me how to store and rotate my clothes. 

I always use New Year's Day to do my closet and drawer cleaning. Typically it starts to get cold and snowy in January (this winter the elements started early), so this day is a great day to put away the summer and fall items. 

 I start with my piles on the floor; giveaway, trash, and dry cleaners. This year is a year of honesty. I'm such a pack rat. I have clothes from back when I was a size 14. I keep it around because I'm going to lose the weight and wear it this year....HA! I'm proud of myself because I let a lot of things go. 

It took all day but I'm happy with the results. I got all my summer and lightweight fall pieces put away and went through my winter stuff and tried on EVERYTHING to make sure what I kept from the last season still wore well. I even color coded my half of the closet. We will see how long this last. I'm going to make a conscious effort to keep it organized and cleaned.

There is NO room for error. So I keep rotate my shoes and other accessories too. I keep them in bins. The other bins for out of season pieces I keep in the other closets throughout the apartment.

When you clean out your closets and drawers, you always find pieces you forgot about. These two are no exceptions. 

A genuine leather winter white bolero from Ashley Stewart. I bought this when I worked for them many moons ago. Loved it then....love it now!

A kimono I bought off Ebay from China. I was going to a party and I wanted to wear a kimono. I bought this one and at the time it was too big. I didn't want to go through the hastle of returning it to China, so I was going to get it altered. A few pounds later, it's wearable with the right accessories and minor alterations to make it form fitting. Will make this work!

Janelle

Really? Fashion Duct Tape

I'm starting a new column of my blog. It's called "Really?". It will focus on things that make me scratch my head.

Duck Duct Tape Patterns is available in an assortment of colors and designs.

Remember when duct tape was used to just tape things together. Duct tape is used more for fashion purposes now than it is used for a household helper. Saw on the telly last night the Duck brand is now selling patterned duct tape. So for all you people that want to make your accessories or prom dress, you can now choose from zebra or leopard print duct tape. There is a quirky website where everything is made out of duct tape. Duct tape seems to be the new medium of fabric now.

Janelle

Happy New Year & Domino Dollhouse Review

(Happy New Year! So hot in our apartment...60 degrees in December in INDIANA! It took so long for the temperature to regulate. The tons of jello shots and pineapple vodka didn't help much either!)

Happy New Year from Ruby Leonne! 

I was privileged to end the year at home with close friends. It's hard having single friends when you're in a relationship. Most of the party left before midnight so they can go and hang with their potential significant others. But I want to thank everyone for coming out and spending time with Jay and I. It was a great time. Can you believe it's a new year...a new decade.

Before the party I had a wardrobe melt down. I told my fiance to wear black; I had planned to wear my new Cocktails for Breakfast dress I bought from Domino Dollhouse. Domino Dollhouse is a new online plus size boutique I was introduced to by a blog post by Stiletto Siren of Lips Hips & FATshion Tips. They sell apparel, accessories and shoes. 

When I first got the dress a few weeks ago, I was impressed with the service. I got my order within 2-3 days. The cost was reasonable and inexpensive. When I first looked at the dress, I winced. I am a size 22/24; sometimes a 26 in the hips. This dress appeared to be REALLY small but not small enough that I couldn't make it work...or so I thought! Umm yeah...I got a 3X (Junior Plus), I couldn't get it past my hips and zipping it up was not an option. I was so disappointed! One of my friends LOVED it and could fit it so I sold it to her. 

I will order from Domino Dollhouse again. I love the speed of service and chat with the owner , Tracey, on Twitter frequently. She is a doll! I will just be careful or steer clear of the junior plus items. Here is my wish list from Domino Dollhouse...

Classic Doll Dress from Domino Dollhouse $69.99

Bow Satin Slide from Domino Dollhouse $52.99

Janelle